“We are our own worst critic” -Unknown
Often in life, we hold ourselves to higher standards than others hold us to. We criticize ourselves in the name of perfection. But what is even perfection? This cactus is on my way to work is pokey and imperfect, but it still bloomed a beautiful flower. Just like the cactus, we aren’t perfect, and we may have a couple of spikes, but we have the capability of blooming into something beautiful when we give ourselves some grace.
Monday, I was working in the Maize Quality Lab with Aldo Rosales. He was having me do prep work for an experiment. This included tasks from washing and prepping crucibles and measuring out different maize flour samples. But this preparation also required me to make two reactants: 95% Ethanol and 78% Ethanol. Sounds super fancy, but in all reality, it was Ethanol mixed with distilled water. However, the hard part was that the Ethanol came in a huge metal drum that you had to lift over your head to pour into very delicate glassware. I was trying so hard to do everything perfectly because I wanted to show him that I deserved to be here.
Prepping the Crucibles
Measuring the Flour Samples
After spilling ethanol all over the counter, down my arm, and changing my lab coat twice, I was ready to be done. I was done trying to pour the ethanol into the two-liter graduated cylinder. I felt so embarrassed.
However, Aldo looked at me and said, “Why don’t you try one more time?” I looked at him, trying to figure out if he was being serious or not. Did this scientist really want me to make another mess in his lab after already making two? I had messed up. Reluctantly, I picked up the drum once again and poured it into the cylinder. Sure, I made a little bit of a mess this time, but I completed the mixtures.
I didn’t realize at the time, but Aldo was giving me the grace I wouldn’t give myself. He allowed me to make mistakes and learn from them without judgment. This grace allowed me to develop my skills and learn more than I would’ve from being perfect.
Pouring the Ethanol Mixture into Storage Containers (In the left picture, you can see the Ethanol Drum Behind Me)
On Tuesday, I was scheduled to spend the day with the MEAL (Data Science) Team, but things didn’t go as planned; the person I was supposed to shadow never came in. I could’ve seen it as a wasted day, but I reminded myself to give the situation some grace and stayed open to whatever the day might bring. Around noon, a woman from the department invited me to learn more about their work. When her slideshow refused to cooperate, I saw her frustration building. Instead of focusing on the technical issues, I gave her grace, meeting her where she was and shifting the moment by asking about her experience in the department. That conversation turned out to be far more meaningful than any presentation.
The Presentation I was Given (Bonus: The Amazing Meal I Had!)
On Wednesday, I attended the first day of a CIMMYT Induction session for new researchers, scientists, interns, and students. After a full day of activities, I returned to my dorm and prepared for my usual post-work routine: a run. But as I started, I quickly realized how sore and exhausted my legs felt. Normally, I would’ve pushed through the discomfort. But this time, I chose something different; I gave myself grace. I slowed down, listened to my body, and walked instead. That small act of kindness toward myself transformed the evening. Rather than pushing through pain, I gave myself space to rest, and in doing so, found more peace and presence in the moment.
A Part of the Induction Session and Museum Tour
Thursday was similar to Wednesday with another day of induction sessions, but something new unfolded too. I connected with Sylvia, one of my officemates. We hit it off, shared stories, and even made plans to explore Mexico City together this weekend. But like most new friendships, there were quiet moments, and even a few awkward ones. I caught myself spiraling, wondering why everything didn’t feel perfectly smooth or effortless. But then I paused and reminded myself to give this relationship some grace. It’s new. It’s growing. And it doesn’t need to be perfect to be meaningful.
Meet Sylvia (Far Right Picture), she is from Kenya and is conducting research for her master's. Pictures from today's induction session
This Friday, I was back in the lab with Aldo, preparing more flour samples, digesting the ones from earlier in the week, and even making tortillas. But this time, I didn’t mess up. Earlier in the week, I had made mistakes, but instead of letting them define me, I gave myself grace and viewed them as part of the learning process. That mindset made all the difference. By allowing myself space to stumble on Monday, I was able to grow, improve, and succeed by Friday. Giving ourselves grace isn’t about avoiding failure; it’s about embracing it as a step toward progress.
Digesting the Maize Flour Samples
Making Tortillas with Aide
Giving yourself grace is not about lowering expectations or avoiding responsibility; it’s about recognizing your humanity. Life doesn’t always go as planned, and neither do we. We get tired, we make mistakes, we spill ethanol all over the lab counter. But when we respond to those moments with compassion instead of criticism, we create space to grow, to heal, and to keep going. Grace reminds us that we’re a work in progress, and that’s okay. It allows us to embrace imperfection, to learn without shame, and to show up fully, both for ourselves and for others. In a world that often demands constant productivity and perfection, giving yourself grace is one of the most powerful and necessary acts of self-respect.
I have been able to make so much of my experiences this week by giving myself grace and room to grow. To my fellow interns, give yourself some grace. Make mistakes and then grow from them. You’ll learn so much more if you do.
“Experience is merely the name men gave to their mistakes.”
-Oscar Wilde
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Thanks for a great lesson about grace for the week!! ❤️❤️